confusion247's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- - I think I use to be a really awesome guy...well, person in general. And then I got let down, a lot. And decided that if that was going to happen to me, then I shouldn't feel bad about doing it to other people. And then more shit happened, and now I'm just a fucked up jaded person. Everything pisses me off, and I've come to find that, well, everyone is selfish and in everything for themself. As one asshole poet put in, "Your shade is fuck." Well, that's everyone. Even the amazing nice people, like that guy that I'm rather pissed at right now, even they are selfish. I guess it's not about being selfish or not, it's about caring about people. Caring that it makes someone feel like shit when you drive a total of 8 hours in a day to pick them up and then you don't answer your phone or even try to call them. I'm a much different person then I use to be, and I don't think it's for the better. I move into a house with three girls tomorrow. One dated my sister, one is dating brandon, and the other one I don't even know. To tell the truth I probably wouldn't have agreed to move in if it wasn't for the fact that they'd be fucked otherwise. I mean, it's going to be awesome, but I don't like being asked to do something because no one else will. It makes it seem like I'm not really wanted, I'm just a last resort. Which I know isn't it, and it will probably be fucking amazing. No, I know it will be. I love the fuck out of two of the girls and they're amazing people who never make me feel like less of a person and they're not shady and they're probably the best roommates I could get. I'm thankful. I really am. I delivered a pizza in the ghetto today and I saw a bunch of homeless people, some in wheel chairs, some hobbling down the road, most missing teeth. It was really fucking sad. I don't know how I can look at my life and be upset. I can't. Am I desperate for exceptence? 1:42 a.m. - 2005-08-27 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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