confusion247's Diaryland Diary -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I've been feeling a lot better lately. I just haven't been thinking about things any...it makes me not feel sick as anything. I got into an argument with her yesterday. How can she say that everything I ever said to her was a lie? How can she think I never ment anything I said? I ment every word I ever said to her. I never lied until now. Why won't she believe me? Well, I guess I can understand...it just seems odd to me that this one mistake led to all this. One mistake can ruin everything. I just want to be with her again...this is so difficult. So freaking difficult. I'm going to stop thinking about it now. I'm over at Caiden's house, and I woke up super early for some reason. It's only 11 o'clock and I"m already up, dressed, and showered. Yesterday I didn't wake up until 6:20 in the afternoon. All I've really done lately is snuck out and slept. EVerynight since I've gotten back I sneak out super late, and come home at 4 in the morning. My summer has been pretty great concidering it's only my sophomore year, and I'm 15. My summer has consisted of: Clarksville for a month, it was fun, I saw all my friends, and concerts, and I got drunk constantly. I sneak out nightly and hang out with friends until really early in the morning. I'm going to be going on a road trip pretty soon with Caiden and Mary Catherine. I'm going to be working at the tv studio doing things I do for free during the year and getting payed for it. I have plenty of friends here and in Clarksville. My summer hasd just been really great. The only thing that has made it less than perfect is the fact that Shelley and I are no longer together...this is so difficult, if I had only been a better boyfriend. Lately Angel has been acting really weird...she acts like I'm still saying things to her like "I really like you," or "I wish we could be together" and things like that. I haven't in so fucking long, monthes. I wish she'd stop acting like this, it's irritating. ANd she's writing me letters about how I'm so confusing and incincere and fake, and manipulative. What the fuck. I wish I could just be friends with her, but I don't think that could ever happen. For the record, The Phantom is like the WORST movie ever. I'm watching it right now. It's this or the Golden Girls, but all I think about when I watch The Golden Girls is Shelley...she was such a cute girl, and still is...I have this never ending movie montage of thoughts of her, I told her this and she said "well, my little montage is different, it's all about whether everything you ever said to me was a lie" and things like that. She really truely hates me. No one has ever hated me before. It seems so odd. Normally I'm the nice guy, in this case, I'm the exact opposite. I'm going to go, I really love this new template, it's me. Rachel agreed. I have to fix the older page still though. I'm going to get going and wake up Caiden. I'm hungry too, so I think I'm going to make some breakfast...I'm back on my veg edge. It helps a lot because I don't eat as much. Love, Danny 11:04 a.m. - 2003-06-20 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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